I was talking with one of my girlfriends
the other day, and the topic of men came
up, as it always inevitably does, and I realized that not a single one of the
my closest girlfriends has a man. It saddened me, not only because I would love
to go on some double dates with my girls, but because all of the women in my
circle attractive, educated, fun, and just really
really nice and good women. Like the kind of women that any sane man should
be proud to “claim” as his own. Now I
could see if my girls were the “exceptions “to the rule, especially since every
friend thinks her friend is the
greatest, however, in my travels around DC in different social circles, it
appears as though an overwhelmingly large amount of women in this town are definitely
single,Sex in the City style. This newfound revelation got me to thinking, why
are sooo many attractive, educated, seemingly nice women by most standards, so single in a town that has some of the
most progressive, eligible bachelors this country has to offer? After some
personal observation I came up with my list of the Top Five Reasons why a woman
could be single in Chocolate City.
1. Numbers Game –Let’s
face it….women that are pretty, smart, and even “exotic” come a dime a dozen in
this town. Men that are equally attractive- or even not so attractive but think
they are, that have status and money, don’t have to rush to choose just one
woman, when the amount of thirst
attractive and smart women display, allows them to keep their options
open.
2. Why Buy the Cow when You can Get the
Milk for Free – I realized that all of my girls, even me ,
have been giving an overwhelming majority of the male interests in our lives,
free access to our lives, bodies, minds, and sometimes even souls, virtually
for free. I hate to sound like Steve Harvey but we really have not required the
man of our desires to want or have to commit to us because we give him
everything willingly without commitment. Like most people who are given free
gifts, the recipient will just take take without giving anything in return.
3. Unrealistic Expectations -
We all pretty much want the man who over six feet tall is making a decent
living for himself, when perhaps the brotha who is a hard worker but only
5’10’’ is getting overlooked. Ironically,
no one in my close circle of friends has a list that’s ten feet tall or has
dated a man that looks like ( insert man of your dreams here) , however, maybe
they do have some quirky expectation that is just unrealistic in this day and
age that coincides with a true man of character. After all, most of the married women that I do
know, are not married to their typical “type” but to just a good man.
4. Shallowness –
Yes I said it and I mean on the part of a lot of eligible bachelors in the DMV.
Perhaps the male gaze is not going to women that don’t fit their unique box of
what is of interest to them aesthetically, so if you don’t fall in that box,
whatever it is, you will get overlooked. This translates to it’s their (men’s )
problem not yours!
5. Timing - At the end of the
day, no matter what you want personally as a woman, if a man is not ready to
settle down in either a relationship or marriage, he just won’t. There is
nothing you can do or not do if that is not what he wants or where his head is.
The common theme among those I know who
are coupled up, is that their dude was just ready to be with one person for
whatever reason, and the stars and moons aligned at the right time and in the
right place for them to be together.
So DMV, What do you think? Why are so many
women in DC single??
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