My friends and I were looking for an apartment together and went to look at these amazing apartments in DC. After my last relationship ended in an epic failure my friends knew I was always on the prowl for new conquests or "prospects" I should say. WhenI got to the apartment they told me I was going to be in love with the leasing officer and I thought to myself ,Yea Right! So when I finally saw him I was like eh he is kind of short ,5'8 ,but nice complexion and a beautiful smile, well dressed, so not so bad all in all I thought. He takes us around and we are talking and I realize he's actually kind of interesting. He is funny and personable and as I continued to be around him he definitely got more attractive. We start doing some sexy flirting and he starts calling me Mami. Come to find out he is from the Dominican Republic ( Heeeeeey Papi) and like so many others I am a sucker for a sexy accent and a man who knows how to speak another language. Anyway ,we decide to exchange numbers. During our first convo on the phone he suggests that I come over so he can make me dinner. Now I am telling you that the first date at his house should have been a red flag, but, yes ,I was being the typical girl and just disregarded it. We were supposed to meet at 5 pm in Adams Morgan at Tryst. So I get there early and I am waiting outside a Starbucks talking to my bff before the date. There ends up being some confusion and he doesn't come and get me until damn near 7 pm. At this time I am talking to my girlfriend and contemplating if I should leave. Somehow he magically shows up and is like lets go back to "my house.." So we literally walk about 2 blocks around the corner and he takes me to this this beautiful four level 4 bedroom brownstone. I mean absolutely amazingly great layout and everything. So we are drinking and grilling, and somehow while we are outside I close the door. What I didn't realize was that the door was locked, so we are literally locked out of the house! I am like where is someone with the key. I am about to freak out because up to this point everything is cool. We are getting along well. The conversation is good he compliments me and seems cool. So I immediately think Shit,this date is ruined I have locked us out of the house and we have no way of getting back in. In the midst of the lock out and confusion things went from bad to worse. While I'm over there panicking he is amazingly calm. When I ask him what should we do, he says, " Oh I'll just call my boy whose house this is" Wait pause...WTF...DUDE THIS IS NOT YOUR HOUSE???
He winds up calling his friend and he tells him this trick to open the window and he somehow manages to slide through and climb through the window and then open the door. I am like WOW, during the entire thing he keeps it cool, and never ever gets mad or even flinches. He is completely chill which is such a turn on( in spite of the fact this is not his damn house!). I like a man who has emotional stability because I am an out of control emotional trainwreck sometimes. Once we get inside we get back to making dinner together. Because of this incident I ask him whose house is this and he tells me its not his but his friends and he is house sitting. Ok, I did forget to mention this man is 34 has been married before but no children and supposedly lives in his own condo around the corner. So I go with it. So after dinner we are watching tv and somehow the moves are made and we go at it. Now within a few moments he ends up completely naked and is trying to stick it in. No he doesnt have a condom on or anything and we definitely haven't had the STD/AIDS talk or anything. So I am saying uh no, we can kiss, but we are definitely not screwing each other. But he is persistent and he definitely wants to play so I let him have all the fun he wants. Now, I know we should not perpetuate stereotypes but I have to say the stereotype of Latin men being more passionate was proven and definitely worth all the hype that night. This dude by far had some great head game going on. Anyway, I am getting tired of messing around on the couch and decide to go to a room. He takes me upstairs to a bedroom with an air mattress (TURN OFF) but hey the head is worth laying on an air mattress. So literally the man kisses me to sleep. I mean I literally fall asleep with him wrapped around my body and his mouth on mine. I wake up in the morning and he goes at it again, of course all the while hoping to stick it in. But I am going to be honest, his dick was kind of small (I unfortunately have been turned out by bigger men so this "little" man aint really turning me on down there all like that! But, I digress. Anyway, we wake up and my lips and body are sore from his particular attention paid to my body. We get up and get dressed and he asks if I want something to drink. I tell him water but he pours himself a vodka and cranberry which I think is a little much for 9:30 am on a Sunday morning. (I have to mention that one of the reasons this was a huge red flag is I have dated an alcoholic which is another story so this was another WTF moment) Anyway so after that he walks me to my car and we call it a day. So that was my first date with this man. So while my dealings with him should have ended there it didn't!
Where it really gets interesting is the second date. So I am out in the city again and we decide to meet up but for some reason we can't seem to get together until damn near 11pm. Anyway so we meet up again at Tryst in Adams Morgan. I tell him that I'm tired from working and at that I have to work the next day so I am not trying to do too much but chill. Anyway he starts with the compliments again which is nice but I realize through all of our conversations he hasn't really said much about him or who he is or anything. He generally spends the entire conversation talking about how gorgeous I am and how beautiful my eyes are and dont let anyone look at them. On the first date I thought it was cute, but now I am getting a little annoyed. Like there are other things to talk about than my eyes. Anyway, he's like lets get out of here. So mind you he said on the first date he has a condo around the corner. Now most of you know that parking in Adams Morgan is a fucking bitch so I had valeted my car. He was like let's get it and let's go so my dumb behind assumes we are going back to his place. So I pay for the valet and we get into my car and drive off. I am like where are we going and he says Virgina. I am like WTF???? I told you I am tired and I am not driving to fucking VA, I was like why don't we go back to your place. He is like no I have a better place. I am like ok, so he tells me to drive as we turn the corner this fool has the nerve to point out his condo and say I live right there. I am like WTF but why are we not stopping there, but lets see this better place. I should of known then this was not going to end well. Anyway we drive about 20 minutes away and he tells me to pull over. I am like ok why? So I do for whatever I reason I do and this dude takes the seatbelt off and proceeds to make out with me. I am WTF is going on here. Did we just drive past your house to make out in my fucking car!!!!!!!!!!!! you have to be fucking kidding me. You are 34 years old and supposedly single why the fuck are we making out in my car?!?!?! I was completely over it and I am like we are not doing this. He's like is everything okay? I am like why are we making out in my car? He tells me HIS PARENTS LIVE WITH HIMand they don't get along so each one stays in each of his two bedrooms and he sleeps on the couch. He says they are really old fashioned and would not understand him bringing girls back to the house. I am like really? Really? At 34, a divorced, man can't bring women back to his home? Ummm, sure! I proceed to take him back to the restaurant. Well I am not sure why someone at this age who has their own place would proceed to make out with me in the car unless there was a reason he did not want me at his place. We have talked since and he says he can't believe I thought he was married. I said well let me come over. I'm still waiting on my invitation....so you decide if mi casa es su casa!
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Sunday, March 20, 2011
WHO GON CHECK ME BOO??
It was one of those nights where I didn't want to go out, but wanted some company. So this date started with grabbing some coffee at the local coffee shop by my house and ended up at my apartment for late night conversation. I was open to some late night kissing to go along with the conversation!. Now, I have known this guy for a few weeks now. Real cool dude, no crazy signs so I was comfortable. He kept me laughing and showed some interest. Back at the ranch, it was great. We laughed watched TV and even looked up new music online. I decided to get comfortable and change into a tank top and sweats.
I will admit I didn't keep the bra on for a reason, I wanted him to touch them, maybe even suck on them, hell maybe suck on other things! I was game, I was attracted to him. As the night wore on the tank top and no bra worked! He was excited and kept looking at my breasts. We continued to talk and laugh some more until I had to make a move. He was just moving too slow. I took his hand and said geesh my nipples are so hard. That led to him lifting up my top and sucking both nipples. It felt really good! Now I didn't want it to go as far as sex but I wanted some action. He was getting very excited and decided that maybe I should touch his penis. I did, and the minute I felt how SMALL it was, I was turned OFF! It was over, done, a no go.
I decided to see if he was a good kisser or not since afterall perhaps there were some other things he could do! He was a great kisser. The kissing was excellent which kept me engaged, but it went south again when this fool felt comfortable enough to pass gas. This was no small fart, this was a hard, up his butt all night fart. The kind you have to get out or your stomach will hurt. What made it worse was the facial expression he made when letting it out, he had his face turned up and his eyes were closed. OMG dude why do you feel comfortable enough to do this???? This led to 4-5 more hard ass farts and I was just done. It was no more kissing or anything. I simply said, You know what I'm getting tired." He said, " Are you kicking me out of your house? I said "Pretty much. "
I don't think we are going out on a real date anytime soon since he can't control his farts.
I will admit I didn't keep the bra on for a reason, I wanted him to touch them, maybe even suck on them, hell maybe suck on other things! I was game, I was attracted to him. As the night wore on the tank top and no bra worked! He was excited and kept looking at my breasts. We continued to talk and laugh some more until I had to make a move. He was just moving too slow. I took his hand and said geesh my nipples are so hard. That led to him lifting up my top and sucking both nipples. It felt really good! Now I didn't want it to go as far as sex but I wanted some action. He was getting very excited and decided that maybe I should touch his penis. I did, and the minute I felt how SMALL it was, I was turned OFF! It was over, done, a no go.
I decided to see if he was a good kisser or not since afterall perhaps there were some other things he could do! He was a great kisser. The kissing was excellent which kept me engaged, but it went south again when this fool felt comfortable enough to pass gas. This was no small fart, this was a hard, up his butt all night fart. The kind you have to get out or your stomach will hurt. What made it worse was the facial expression he made when letting it out, he had his face turned up and his eyes were closed. OMG dude why do you feel comfortable enough to do this???? This led to 4-5 more hard ass farts and I was just done. It was no more kissing or anything. I simply said, You know what I'm getting tired." He said, " Are you kicking me out of your house? I said "Pretty much. "
I don't think we are going out on a real date anytime soon since he can't control his farts.
WHAT THA?????
Not to sound cliché, but when grandma said “Idol hands are the devils playground”, she wasn't lying! On this particular Saturday morning, while I was sitting around the house bored out of my mind, I decided to renew my subscription to Match.com (initially on this particular weekend, I was supposed to be in Virginia with a guy who had shown his ass that week, so I backed out of the trip). I began to read some of the messages that had been sent to me within the past two months where I was on my internet browsing hiatus (never really went out on dates with the men I met). There was one guy who had sent me two messages within that very week. After reviewing his profile, I thought that he may be decent. He seemed to be the adventurous type, his profile showed pictures of him at a gun range and sky diving. I figured conversation wouldn’t hurt.
I replied to one of his messages telling him that I had a blessed week. Within minutes he responded saying “It’s a beautiful day, how about meeting up for some coffee and enjoying the day with company…” Well, I got the message about two hours later, after I decided to kill more time until the movie I planned on going to see started. So back to Match.com I went. I got the message and at the end of it he left his phone number. I decided “what the heck” so I texted the phone thinking that would be the quickest way for me to get in touch with him saying “I’m sure it's too late for coffee, but how about dessert?”
He texted back with the venue - it was in Georgetown (can’t remember the name of it now). We were meeting at 2pm.I have never enjoyed riding around for long periods of time looking for parking, so I grabbed the first parking spot on M street. However, I was a little late because the walk was to the other end of M street. So, maybe that is what pissed him off… but I’ll get to that in a moment.
As I was walking, I called my DC god-mother to tell her where I was and the name of the fool I was with. I did this just as a precaution since, afterall, I was meeting someone off the freaking internet. When I finally reached my destination I texted him to tell him I was there. I waited for about five minutes before I saw a man pull up in a silver Porsche who then proceeded to park illegally. He approached me and addressed me by my cyber name.
He was tall with a caramel complexion, 35 years old ,thinning hair toward the front of his head, and pigeon toed. This was when I should have ended things right here, but, it was just dessert right! So, as we were waiting on a table, we covered the basic, surface getting to know someone conversation. The questions of “What brought you to DC”, to “What do you do” were all answered. Hmm… maybe he didn’t like what I did as a profession on a day to day. Wait… I’m getting there.
He asked me whether or not I enjoyed festivals. I responded that yes I did enjoy festivals. He then told me about the Taste of Bethesda which was that day and that he had a few friends there and asked if I would like to go. I didn’t mind. I asked him how we would get there. Of course he said he would drive. However, I parked at a two hour meter. He then told me that he would take me to my car so I could move it to some place safe. He explained since he lived in Georgetown he knew all the places where one could park and be okay (that was also his explanation for parking illegally).As I was giving him directions to my car (which was at the opposite end of M street) I noticed the music that was oozing out of his speakers. I asked him what kind of music he listened to. He named some artists that I had never heard of. He then told me that he would listen to anything and he turned on the radio. I guess that he could sense that I wasn’t feeling his taste in music. He made a few wrong turns on the straight shot to my car, but once we got to my car I asked him, “Now, you promise that you are not going to allow me to park somewhere that would result in a ticket?” He assured me that he would not. So, I get out of the car, and as soon as I turned around and walk towards my car door, he sped off!!!
Was it something I said…???
Monday, March 7, 2011
IN THE HEAT OF THE NIGHT
It was a Friday night, we were just leaving RECESS, which is adult game night, in VA. One of my girls is driving , the other is in the backseat, and I’m in the passenger seat. We’re cruising in DC past Ozzios when I look to the right and see a police car sitting next to me. I kind of casually glance over, Hey nothing wrong with a man in uniform! Out of the corner of my eye I see the officer in the passenger seat appears to be a cutie! I quickly turn my head when I see he peeps my glance and as we’re about to pull off the officer who’s driving motions for us to pull over down the block. I’m like Oh Lord here we go ! I wasn’t trying holla I was just taking a look. So when we pull over to the side Passenger Officer gets out of the car and walks up to my window. Okay now that I get a good glimpse, officer is FIONE. And I don’t usually go for the high yellow blue eyes type, but this one right here has that sexy Michael Ealey thing going on so I can make an exception for him! Mr. Officer exchanges pleasantries with my girls then proceeds to ask me for my name and then my number. As we pull of I’m thinking Okay Mr. Officer!! As soon as I walk in the house he calls. He’s a little younger than my usual, but it’s cool I’m not getting excited yet! We agree to meet up later on that week. Due to my scheduling conflicts we didn’t meet when originally planned but Mr. Officer is persistent, so he finally meets me for drinks after work, right across the street from my job a few weeks later. He’s cute outside of his uniform and those eyes, did I mention they were blue? He’s a perfect gentleman on the date, nice conversation, nice laughs, easy going, pays for everything, we’re vibing well here. Over the course of the evening he asks me if I’m single and why. I tell him I just got out of a three year relationship and am taking it easy. He volunteered that he was single as well. I didn’t ask any probing questions because I really didn’t care. We were just getting drinks, nothing more or less. I’m really in a head space where I don’t want to be bothered with men beyond the platonic friend level anyway. At the end of the evening he walks me to the garage where my car is parked and where his is as well. I see a baby seat in the back of his car and ask him if that is for his child. He said no he doesn’t have kids but works undercover picking up “Ladies of the Night” and the car seat is one of the props he uses when pretending to be a regular “John”. I said okay and goodnight and that was that.
We talked on the phone a few more times after that date. When he asks me out again he asks me if I have friends so we can do kind of a group thing which I thought was kind of strange, but whatever, group outings are cool with me! One night he calls and I tell him my girls and I are doing dinner at Busboys and Poets. He said he was on duty but was going to come through and say hi and bring his partner. So he comes through Busboys gun loaded, waves it at the waiter, showing off! We laugh and joke and he leaves to go back on duty. Again at this point nothing serious, he is still just a cool guy to know, nothing more or less. Of course we flirt via text but that’s about it.
Fast forward a few months, we still have not had face time after Busboys and I was too busy doing my own thing to even notice, but anyway fast forward a few months and he tells me has a friend in town from Georgia that is doing an internship here so to bring one of my girls so we can all get drinks at the bar near where the friend is staying. I agree, no problem. We get there and he introduces me to his two boys. I introduce him to my girl and we’re all on the bar just chillin. We order our food and drinks. One of his boys is flirting with my girl, him and I are doing our thing, when out of nowhere this hoodrat pops up next to him. It was obvious they knew one another by the body language and interaction and this Beesh looks like she ready to just join our group, leaning over him laughing, whispering in his ear flirting BIG TIMMMME. I’m looking at my girl like Wow what a rude beesh! I can’ check her cause he’s not my man, he’s no one really, but I’m just observing how this all goes down. He’s chopping it up right along with her. At this point his other boy comes along and is trying to keep me occupied, but after a certain point I realize his boy is flirting with me. Hmm okay this is strange. He’s telling me about his career moves what he’s studying blah blah. Then he asks for my number. Now ordinarily outta respect for his boy I would decline, but hey his boy and I are not dating, nor is his boy dismissing this rude B so why not, I’m always down to meeting cool people. Ol girl finally leaves and I look at Mr Officer and don’t even say anything. He’s like, “Why didn’t you save me from her, she is so annoying blah blah. I’m like," Umm aren’t you a grown man, a police officer nonetheless, you don’t know how to dismiss chicken heads? Not my problem dear." So we continue chillin and do you know this B comes back!! My girl and I are like naw you have to be kidding me. So his homeboy tries to break the ice and is cracking jokes. At this point I’m ready to go because how did you invite someone out and then you sit here entertaining someone that clearly has a thing for you and you clearly must have a thing for her because you are not politely excusing her. After she leaves the second time Mr. Officer quickly jumps from the bar and says he has to take an urgent call. It’s close to midnight now. So I figure perhaps duty calls. He comes back and says Well goodnight everyone. I must go I have to do blah blah. Fine with me I was leaving anyway!
As we’re walking out his homeboy is still in my ear walking me to my car, inviting me on a date before he leaves town. I’m still thinking this is all so strange what kind of ménage did I walk into? The next day I check out homeboy’s Facebook page and I see two pics of Mr. Officer. He’s in a limo in one pic and the caption reads , “Last night with Mr. Officer before (insert girl name here) locks him down. “ Huh” eyebrows raised at this point..WTH. Before he’s locked down? Is this Negro married? Hit next and see Mr. Officer in a pic dancing in a tuxedo with his bride!!Okay hands in the air at this point. So this Negro really is married! Okay now it allll makes sense! Explains the unavailability on certain days, wanting to always be in a group, running out of the bar like a bat out of hell because it’s late. So I write a comment under one pic like “How cute”. His boy calls me after like," Oh snap you didn’t know Mr Officer was married?" I was like Naw he left that out. He was like "Yea and his wife is an Officer too, I thought you knew blah blah. "He then added that Mr. Officer always does this and I tell him he needs to be honest, the girl on the bar is an escort he was messing with "blah bla…at this point I’m speechless…like wow! So not only is he cheating on his wife who is a cop and could potentially KILL HIM, he’s cheating on her with escorts and random chicks..SMDH! So glad I didn’ t take this dude seriously and he is out of my life.
We talked on the phone a few more times after that date. When he asks me out again he asks me if I have friends so we can do kind of a group thing which I thought was kind of strange, but whatever, group outings are cool with me! One night he calls and I tell him my girls and I are doing dinner at Busboys and Poets. He said he was on duty but was going to come through and say hi and bring his partner. So he comes through Busboys gun loaded, waves it at the waiter, showing off! We laugh and joke and he leaves to go back on duty. Again at this point nothing serious, he is still just a cool guy to know, nothing more or less. Of course we flirt via text but that’s about it.
Fast forward a few months, we still have not had face time after Busboys and I was too busy doing my own thing to even notice, but anyway fast forward a few months and he tells me has a friend in town from Georgia that is doing an internship here so to bring one of my girls so we can all get drinks at the bar near where the friend is staying. I agree, no problem. We get there and he introduces me to his two boys. I introduce him to my girl and we’re all on the bar just chillin. We order our food and drinks. One of his boys is flirting with my girl, him and I are doing our thing, when out of nowhere this hoodrat pops up next to him. It was obvious they knew one another by the body language and interaction and this Beesh looks like she ready to just join our group, leaning over him laughing, whispering in his ear flirting BIG TIMMMME. I’m looking at my girl like Wow what a rude beesh! I can’ check her cause he’s not my man, he’s no one really, but I’m just observing how this all goes down. He’s chopping it up right along with her. At this point his other boy comes along and is trying to keep me occupied, but after a certain point I realize his boy is flirting with me. Hmm okay this is strange. He’s telling me about his career moves what he’s studying blah blah. Then he asks for my number. Now ordinarily outta respect for his boy I would decline, but hey his boy and I are not dating, nor is his boy dismissing this rude B so why not, I’m always down to meeting cool people. Ol girl finally leaves and I look at Mr Officer and don’t even say anything. He’s like, “Why didn’t you save me from her, she is so annoying blah blah. I’m like," Umm aren’t you a grown man, a police officer nonetheless, you don’t know how to dismiss chicken heads? Not my problem dear." So we continue chillin and do you know this B comes back!! My girl and I are like naw you have to be kidding me. So his homeboy tries to break the ice and is cracking jokes. At this point I’m ready to go because how did you invite someone out and then you sit here entertaining someone that clearly has a thing for you and you clearly must have a thing for her because you are not politely excusing her. After she leaves the second time Mr. Officer quickly jumps from the bar and says he has to take an urgent call. It’s close to midnight now. So I figure perhaps duty calls. He comes back and says Well goodnight everyone. I must go I have to do blah blah. Fine with me I was leaving anyway!
As we’re walking out his homeboy is still in my ear walking me to my car, inviting me on a date before he leaves town. I’m still thinking this is all so strange what kind of ménage did I walk into? The next day I check out homeboy’s Facebook page and I see two pics of Mr. Officer. He’s in a limo in one pic and the caption reads , “Last night with Mr. Officer before (insert girl name here) locks him down. “ Huh” eyebrows raised at this point..WTH. Before he’s locked down? Is this Negro married? Hit next and see Mr. Officer in a pic dancing in a tuxedo with his bride!!Okay hands in the air at this point. So this Negro really is married! Okay now it allll makes sense! Explains the unavailability on certain days, wanting to always be in a group, running out of the bar like a bat out of hell because it’s late. So I write a comment under one pic like “How cute”. His boy calls me after like," Oh snap you didn’t know Mr Officer was married?" I was like Naw he left that out. He was like "Yea and his wife is an Officer too, I thought you knew blah blah. "He then added that Mr. Officer always does this and I tell him he needs to be honest, the girl on the bar is an escort he was messing with "blah bla…at this point I’m speechless…like wow! So not only is he cheating on his wife who is a cop and could potentially KILL HIM, he’s cheating on her with escorts and random chicks..SMDH! So glad I didn’ t take this dude seriously and he is out of my life.
CAN SOMEONE LEND ME A HAND?
After a day or running errands for nearly 3 hours, the last thing I wanted was some strange guy talking to me, but Michael was different. He had the kind of energy I was looking for from the day, but most importantly I saw "fun" and a good time in him. I was wrong, dead wrong. If you told me to name three things wrong with Michael, let’s just say being in a mental hospital was not one of them!
It all happened at a nearby CVS. I noticed that the man in front of me was doing a lot of talking to the cashier to the point that it irritated me and I just wanted to buy my purchase and get out of there. When he turned around he smiled so hard that it made me smile. I was shocked. He said "Hello, how are you ?wow you have a great smile." That led to a small conversation and us exchanging numbers. A few minutes later I get a call and it was Michael . He wanted us to have dinner in a few hours. I agreed and rushed home to change clothes.
Michael was punctual and sincere. He seemed really nice over the phone and I was just caught in the moment so I told him to meet me in front of my building . He didn’t come up, but at this point I shouldn’t have even done that. It was a big NO NO and I was a big DUMB DUMB lol.
He pulled up in a very nice car, jumped out and opened the door for me. The minute I got in the car I could since he was off or nervous. I took it as nervous. We couldn’t decide where to eat. Then he changed his mind about dinner and wanted us to have coffee instead. I am thinking what happened to dinner dude? I said no we can do coffee another say, let’s do dinner since that is what I had my mind set on. So dinner it was but I told him to pick a resturant but he just couldn’t. Besides him talking too much, he was talking too loud. I jump in again and say lets head to this Thai place I have never been to.
We found a great parking space and so it’s off to a better start. He opened the door to the car and the restaurant. Once we sat down I see the tension in his eyes and I’m trying to ease whatever he is nervous about. So we did the back and forth questions but that made him nervous. Then he explains all that he is going through, and I am thinking we all are going through something or have in one point of our lives. The minute he said you don’t understand, I should've believed him!
This guy was 30 years old, engaged seven times, was on 90 days of personal leave from work and at one point was in a mental hospital for seven days. At the age of 16 he had a stroke and was in a coma for four months and had to learn to talk, walk all over again. He was never the same after that. He couldn't finish his thoughts; he was jumpy and sometimes so intense that it scared me. I had a decision to make, either just get through the date, or run out of there and take a cab home. I decided to get through the date and try to be understanding. It was hard. His moods changed every 5 minutes. He was snappy and to top it off his butt didn’t even order his own food, he insisted on sharing mine. I was mad at this point . I was hungry and didn’t want to share. He was like with all that I am going through I lost my appetite. So I asked him "What are you still going through?" He says well I have to move back in my mom’s house and she is the one who sent me to a mental hospital and I don’t know if I can go back to work because they have to determine if I am sane or crazy. CHECK PLEASE!!!
After the insanity confession I am not only scared but I am mad because this is way too much information on a date with a guy that I only just wanted to have dinner with and laugh. I don’t think this guy could ever live a normal life and he was just too cute for crazy.
Me being who I am, I showed concerned and understanding and was trying to keep him calm. I asked him about relationships and he snapped in like 4 seconds. He tells me how no one knows how to love him. He tells me women don’t like him because he is a Muslim. Well I can’t date you either sir, I'm thinking to myself! Lol. All of a sudden gets freaky and tells me he loves my curves my eyes and lips. That was the first normal thing that came out of his mouth all night. The night was coming to an end and I excused myself to the rest room. I return to the table and he greeted me with a big hug and a kiss on the cheek it was nice it made me feel a little better. He held me and didn’t let me go . We walked to the car and that's when IT HAPPENED. He asked me to massage him with lotion in the car. I said Huh? Why? He said I’m just so stressed I just need you to help me. I said and do what? He said, "Can you please massage my dick??"
That is when I went off and said oh no please take me home now. The ride home was quiet and when we pulled up to my house he kept saying I’m so sorry this is not like me, sorry for disrespecting you. I said don’t worry take care.
I ran into the house and screamed. How could this have been a date from hell? Everything went wrong and this dude was crazy, literally.
It all happened at a nearby CVS. I noticed that the man in front of me was doing a lot of talking to the cashier to the point that it irritated me and I just wanted to buy my purchase and get out of there. When he turned around he smiled so hard that it made me smile. I was shocked. He said "Hello, how are you ?wow you have a great smile." That led to a small conversation and us exchanging numbers. A few minutes later I get a call and it was Michael . He wanted us to have dinner in a few hours. I agreed and rushed home to change clothes.
Michael was punctual and sincere. He seemed really nice over the phone and I was just caught in the moment so I told him to meet me in front of my building . He didn’t come up, but at this point I shouldn’t have even done that. It was a big NO NO and I was a big DUMB DUMB lol.
He pulled up in a very nice car, jumped out and opened the door for me. The minute I got in the car I could since he was off or nervous. I took it as nervous. We couldn’t decide where to eat. Then he changed his mind about dinner and wanted us to have coffee instead. I am thinking what happened to dinner dude? I said no we can do coffee another say, let’s do dinner since that is what I had my mind set on. So dinner it was but I told him to pick a resturant but he just couldn’t. Besides him talking too much, he was talking too loud. I jump in again and say lets head to this Thai place I have never been to.
We found a great parking space and so it’s off to a better start. He opened the door to the car and the restaurant. Once we sat down I see the tension in his eyes and I’m trying to ease whatever he is nervous about. So we did the back and forth questions but that made him nervous. Then he explains all that he is going through, and I am thinking we all are going through something or have in one point of our lives. The minute he said you don’t understand, I should've believed him!
This guy was 30 years old, engaged seven times, was on 90 days of personal leave from work and at one point was in a mental hospital for seven days. At the age of 16 he had a stroke and was in a coma for four months and had to learn to talk, walk all over again. He was never the same after that. He couldn't finish his thoughts; he was jumpy and sometimes so intense that it scared me. I had a decision to make, either just get through the date, or run out of there and take a cab home. I decided to get through the date and try to be understanding. It was hard. His moods changed every 5 minutes. He was snappy and to top it off his butt didn’t even order his own food, he insisted on sharing mine. I was mad at this point . I was hungry and didn’t want to share. He was like with all that I am going through I lost my appetite. So I asked him "What are you still going through?" He says well I have to move back in my mom’s house and she is the one who sent me to a mental hospital and I don’t know if I can go back to work because they have to determine if I am sane or crazy. CHECK PLEASE!!!
After the insanity confession I am not only scared but I am mad because this is way too much information on a date with a guy that I only just wanted to have dinner with and laugh. I don’t think this guy could ever live a normal life and he was just too cute for crazy.
Me being who I am, I showed concerned and understanding and was trying to keep him calm. I asked him about relationships and he snapped in like 4 seconds. He tells me how no one knows how to love him. He tells me women don’t like him because he is a Muslim. Well I can’t date you either sir, I'm thinking to myself! Lol. All of a sudden gets freaky and tells me he loves my curves my eyes and lips. That was the first normal thing that came out of his mouth all night. The night was coming to an end and I excused myself to the rest room. I return to the table and he greeted me with a big hug and a kiss on the cheek it was nice it made me feel a little better. He held me and didn’t let me go . We walked to the car and that's when IT HAPPENED. He asked me to massage him with lotion in the car. I said Huh? Why? He said I’m just so stressed I just need you to help me. I said and do what? He said, "Can you please massage my dick??"
That is when I went off and said oh no please take me home now. The ride home was quiet and when we pulled up to my house he kept saying I’m so sorry this is not like me, sorry for disrespecting you. I said don’t worry take care.
I ran into the house and screamed. How could this have been a date from hell? Everything went wrong and this dude was crazy, literally.
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